So the other day I was muching on some sausage (NOT LIKE YOU'RE THINKING DIRTY INTERNET!) Anyway I was chewing a delightful fried polish sausage with garlic-wasabi fried rice, carrots and celery when I decided to hold the biannual Rob-pulls-his-head-up-out-of-the-sand-rubs-his-eyes-and-decides-to-look-around-and-see-what's-going-on-in-his-life session. Then I decided it sounded like more fun to watch the newly added Cartoon Network lineup on Netflix and I postponed the session until the next day, I wasn't doing anything important like re-watching Batman Beyond the next day.
So there I was the next other day, calmly walking along in the woods, minding my own business and bothering no one at all when a coordinated set of inbred expectations snuck up and jumped me just past the bubbling creek. While one of them was busy whacking me about the head and face with my imminent graduation from college, another was punching me in the stomach with time-based development objectives, another still was kicking me in the kneecaps with career uncertainty, a fourth stood there yelling, "WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH YOUR LIFE?!" All the while a final one seemed content to hop around on a neon polo stick while consuming a delicious burrito.
I was more or less instantly beset with anxiety about more or less everything. Beyond the normal "Who am I", and "What is my purpose", there were creeping in "Where am I going to live", "How will I pay for food", "What if I can't get a job", and "How the hell am I supposed to get a job with my degree that does not involve either changing religions or giving up the womenfolk?"
Clearly it was a desperate situation.
I like me some womenfolk.
Being terrified and frozen in place (metaphorically of course, a walk where you're frozen in place quickly becomes awkward, what with all the just standing there) I decided to go back to my room and hop onto the PS3, where I committed acts of brutal competitive violence on complete strangers for a few hours, after which I had a nice dinner, a soothing warm bath and good night's sleep.
The next day I woke up with that awful feeling of regret and terror that comes with ignoring expectation-based fears, when I suddenly realized that what I had done (the whole ignoring it and doing anything other than worrying bit) was really the best thing I could have done at all.
The scriptures say "Today's trouble is enough for today," and "who, by worrying, can add one minute to his life?" I don't mean that playing video games and eating fried sausage and yellow rice topped in french cut green beans with a cream-cheese/wasabi gravy is always the right decision, but I do mean that when one is tempted to worry, my experience leads me to believe that worrying is the last thing one should be doing.
Again, I don't mean that everyone should become a couch potato and throw caution to the wind. Caution is a good thing, and it helps us avoid stupid decisions. But sitting there, languishing in terror of what's to come is something the scriptures (and all common sense) advise against. I have no idea what I'll be doing or where I'll be in May or in September, but I'll be somewhere and things will take care of themselves. I know where I want to be, I have a solid idea of some places where I don't want to be, and I think I'm smart enough to avoid the latter and pursue the former.
Relax. Don't make stupid decisions, but keep on living. Things will probably work out okay, and if they don't, how much does it really matter?
It's been wonderful,
-J.R.M.C.
So there I was the next other day, calmly walking along in the woods, minding my own business and bothering no one at all when a coordinated set of inbred expectations snuck up and jumped me just past the bubbling creek. While one of them was busy whacking me about the head and face with my imminent graduation from college, another was punching me in the stomach with time-based development objectives, another still was kicking me in the kneecaps with career uncertainty, a fourth stood there yelling, "WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH YOUR LIFE?!" All the while a final one seemed content to hop around on a neon polo stick while consuming a delicious burrito.
I was more or less instantly beset with anxiety about more or less everything. Beyond the normal "Who am I", and "What is my purpose", there were creeping in "Where am I going to live", "How will I pay for food", "What if I can't get a job", and "How the hell am I supposed to get a job with my degree that does not involve either changing religions or giving up the womenfolk?"
Clearly it was a desperate situation.
I like me some womenfolk.
Being terrified and frozen in place (metaphorically of course, a walk where you're frozen in place quickly becomes awkward, what with all the just standing there) I decided to go back to my room and hop onto the PS3, where I committed acts of brutal competitive violence on complete strangers for a few hours, after which I had a nice dinner, a soothing warm bath and good night's sleep.
The next day I woke up with that awful feeling of regret and terror that comes with ignoring expectation-based fears, when I suddenly realized that what I had done (the whole ignoring it and doing anything other than worrying bit) was really the best thing I could have done at all.
The scriptures say "Today's trouble is enough for today," and "who, by worrying, can add one minute to his life?" I don't mean that playing video games and eating fried sausage and yellow rice topped in french cut green beans with a cream-cheese/wasabi gravy is always the right decision, but I do mean that when one is tempted to worry, my experience leads me to believe that worrying is the last thing one should be doing.
Again, I don't mean that everyone should become a couch potato and throw caution to the wind. Caution is a good thing, and it helps us avoid stupid decisions. But sitting there, languishing in terror of what's to come is something the scriptures (and all common sense) advise against. I have no idea what I'll be doing or where I'll be in May or in September, but I'll be somewhere and things will take care of themselves. I know where I want to be, I have a solid idea of some places where I don't want to be, and I think I'm smart enough to avoid the latter and pursue the former.
Relax. Don't make stupid decisions, but keep on living. Things will probably work out okay, and if they don't, how much does it really matter?
It's been wonderful,
-J.R.M.C.
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